I began creating these prints while trying to conceive my first child, with visions of becoming rounder and my hopes for being a good mom. The works began with a layers of ink. Soon after I finished the first run-through on the press, my partner and I received the wonderful news that we would be parents.
During the pregnancy, I worked on the second layer of the works, layering colored pencils and pastels on top of the first layer. I added the third and final layer, consisting of gold leaf, a few months after I gave birth.
My work reflects the evolving intricacies of trying to start a family, becoming pregnant and finally being a mother. Over time, my visualizations on becoming a mother gradually became more complex, as simple shapes became more defined and detailed. My life slowed down as I became aware of monitoring fertility, prenatal appointments and watching for baby milestones.
I saw the contrast between this growing organic life and the structured punctuation of monitoring (myself, my baby, these changes) on an organized, regimented calendar. Each new benchmark feels amazing and awkward, with no real knowledge of how it will feel even a week after.
I was inspired by images of follicles, ultrasounds, heart rate and contraction graphs, calendars and growth charts. I layered saturated colors to express the intensity of the emotions I felt during this process. Gold leaf I had been carrying around for 15 years, some of it chemically changed due to aging, represents life growing, as it is both very precious and vulnerable with it’s fragility, yet visually strong and resilient.